I Don't Want a Miracle

Last night, the visiting pastor said something that hit home. You should't ask for a miracle, you should ask to be a blessing. That is deep. Asking for miracles is like living from hand to mouth. But to ask to be a blessing is to operate at a higher level. He gave the illustration of 2 people. 1 that has 5 cars and the other has none. If the guy with 5 cars, gives the other guy a car for free, the other guy receives a miracle. But the other guy is in a position to be used to bless people.

This is a serious paradigm shift. It requires looking at the bigger picture. Believe God for everything. Not to focus on current needs alone. Ive had issues asking God for mundane things. I feel as if am using him or cheapening his love for me. I feel better just asking Him to be with me. To never leave me. To have his grace cover me. To guide and protect me. To forgive me of the sins which i wilfully commit. To help me to have faith in him. But now i can ask for another one. To be a blessing to people not for my own benefit but for his.

I need to learn to be a more compassionate person. I mentioned "love" and "kindness" as some of the core values i need to improve upon this year. In order for me to be a blessing to others i need to let go and open up. But thats what i want to be Lord. A blessing.

Just a quick aside. Before i attended House on the Rock, i just believed what everyone said about it. A church filled with scantily clad ladies and people thinking they are in a disco. What i have discovered is something completely different. The Word that comes from that pulpit has changed my life. I love that church and even though i grumble about a few things now and again, those things are minor. If anything i would invite anyone who hasnt been to come to a Sunday service preferably 2nd service at 9:15pm at the Muson Centre, Onikan.

Its a great place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Easy people

How to Pray

I always had issues with formalised structured prayers. I can do grandiose ones when called upon but i cant talk to God that way in private. Cos thats what prayer means right. Talking to God. It just doesnt flow naturally. I never ever think "Okay God. I wanna talk to you now. So here's my speech" . It just kinda happens. I just communicate with him randomly during the day.

But like most things in life you need structure. The problem with just communicating with him randomly is that you only focus on what you feel like at the moment. You lose sight of the big picture. Like praying for the nation, the world, your church, your place of work. This issue has become more prominent during this fasting period. In trying to step up a gear, am trying to be more structured in my prayer routine. Taking a more holistic (pardon the pun) view is instrumental because it puts your own issues in perspective and stops one being self-centered. I reckon i will have to draft my prayer points and got through them one by one to force myself to be more disciplined in prayer.

One recurring thing am learning from this xtain life is the importance of discipline. Theres no other way round it. You have to be discplined in all aspects of life. Its a lesson am learning and hopefully improving upon.

Anyhow. Enough randomness for today..

That all Folks.

Fasting for Beginners

Yes ive never fasted before. Get over it :). House on the Rock do an annual fast called PUSH (Pray Until Something Happens). I decided to do it this year. However, ive had to customise it to the pecularities of my situation. First we are supposed to break with soup. Giving the hours i work and my commute everyday, am not sure i can live on a bowl of soup a day. Definitely not for a consecutive set of days. So i break the fast with a much needed meal. :)

But a more important issue is how to fast effectively when you are working. How do you keep your thoughts on God any differently than you normally do? Apart from not eating what other things should you do? And not do? How do i make this fast different from when am not fasting?

Shouldnt our relationship with God always be on a consistently high level and not a spike in the graph during lent. A colleague of mine stated that the spike should be permamnent i.e. it should take you to a higher level. Hmmmmmmmm.....This is one of the issues i need to do more research on. But ive started. Will let you know my progress....

Enjoy

Hocus Pocus

Ive been reading a book recently which stated that there are 3 sources of temptation:

1) The World
2) The Flesh
3) The Devil.

Now the first one i can understand cos of the world we live in. But as for the last two, am not so sure. How do you tell the difference? Someone once said that the Devil greatest ever trick was to make the world think he does not exist. There is some element of truth in it. I know about talk of "principalities" etc and how there is a spiritual war going on all around us but i still find it difficult to think that there is a devil/demons out that are hell bent on making me fall. Am not sure if its because its too scary a thought to contemplate or cos it might come across as an excuse whenever i fall. But its just weird.

Yes i know we live in Nigeria and with all the "juju" that apparently goes on surely you should know that there are demonic forces at work. Thats a good point. To be honest, i think its just a scary thought thats all. And that i would rather not think of it, which is probably what the devil wants anyway. If anything the devil uses the world and the weakness of your flesh to try and reach us.

But you know what the devil actually does not have power to make you do anything. We chooose to. As a child of God, we can rest in the knowledge that no such thing can happen to us and that we have the power to overcome.

I have to confess, i dont like talking about this subject because it sounds so weird, like some horror story. Also because its to difficult to understand. I suppose the moral of the story is whatever the source of the temptation we know for certain its not from God but we can utilise His power to overcome it.

Phew that sounds better... I think i will leave this topic for a bit.

Easy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Firmly on the Ground

Ive noticed anytime i start feeling holy and start getting ahead of myself that am now mature or getting stronger in this xtain walk, I always inevitably fall. Its a very sober feeling. It emphasises the need for humility. Am a sinner and no matter the progress i make i should never forget that if not for grace, i am nowhere. I am nothing.

Ive been wondering. If i didnt have faults would i still seek God? That if i didnt have a void in my soul will i still seek his control over my life. The fact that i fall lets me know how much i need him. It puts my feet firmly on the ground. It removes all the pride i might feel. It allows be to stop being judgemental about other people. It helps me to better understand humanity and human beings. To see why people behave the way they do.

But the best thing it dos is gives you peace. To know that your soul is in good hands gives you peace. The fact that there is someone who loves you so much and is willing you on the race of life is refreshing.

Walking with God is an amazing experience. I hope i can keep on this track no matter what trials and tribulations come my way......

Its Monday. Hope you enjoy the rest of the week......

Looking forward to a beating

Dont worry i have not turned into some sort of masochist overnight. I just want to talk about divine punishment. When we fall as we do in this xtian walk we are normally hit by 2 different emotions. Guilt and Fear. Guilt over what we have done, Fear of God's punishment. I know that God is merciful and he doesnt punish us as we deserve. But He still punishes us when He thinks we need "sorting-out". Now this seems counter-intuitive or maybe perverse, but rather than being scared of God's punishment, shouldnt we look forward to it?

God just doesnt punish us just cos he feels like, but to put us back on track on our mission to seek him and have a deep relationship with him. But how do we know when we are being punished or being tested? Well, in my humble opinion, it doesnt matter. They both serve the same purpose. Keep us on track with our relationship with God. One intends to bring us back to our relationship with him, the other to take us to another level of fellowship with him.

But hold on. Am not saying we shouldnt fear God or revere Him. Am just saying we shouldnt picture him as a wicked secondary teacher who just loves caning people at the slightest inkling and that we should run away from him or come to him with a fearful heart.

Every once in a while, i look over this blog and read through my previous posts. I remember how i felt when i poured out my heart and then i realise that i am changing. My mind is being renewed. I feel unburdened. I still have a long way to go but i think i have started the race. I remember my final year in University when i got the "shock therapy" i needed to start making moves to sort my life out. I used to think if i started this journey a lot earlier than i would be a in "better place" in my life (both spiritually and professionally). But God's time is best. Am at peace now. And you know what. You cant ask for more than that.

Later People..........

A Different Type of Promised Land.

The Israelites longed for a land flowing with milk and honey. To most of us the Promised Land might be a physical location or possessions or status. I want to focus on the Promised Land as a state of being. A place of righteousness. A place of “Christ-likeness”. A place of oneness with God. It took the Israelites 40 years to get to the Promised Land but we all know that the actual journey should have taken weeks.

So why did the Israelites travel for years trying to get to the Promised Land? What can I learn from their experience? What kept them back from reaching the Promised Land earlier? Well they complained, worshipped other gods, basically they didn’t have faith in God that they would get there.

One of the things that a pastor said recently was the difference between working hard and working smart. The forty years was just not necessary. But how do I apply this principle to my life? Well, it shows that the road to spiritual maturity will be as long as I make it. It doesn’t have to be a multi-year fight or does it? Was the Israelites’ wandering for 40 years necessary for them to appreciate the Promised Land when they got there? Is a long protracted struggle on my quest necessary for me to appreciate being spiritually mature?

Hold on Faith. That’s it. If they had faith that God was gonna get them to the Promised Land, they wouldn’t have done all the things they did. So if I have faith, I can overcome whatever bumps I meet on my path and get there quicker. Or is it get there on time? Hmmmmm……

But can it be that easy. Just have faith. That’s all you need. Well faith backed up by actions. Now I think I understand why faith is so important. If we see our lives as a journey to the Promised Land, and see obstacles we face as bumps on the way to that Promised Land and have faith that we can overcome those bumps and back up that faith with actions, we will get to the Promised Land. Phew!!! That’s a mouthful……

Interesting. But can it be possible that these bumps in the road are not what we think they are? If our purpose in life is to seek God. Then the Promised Land is Finding God. If the journey is seeking him and if we view all the challenges we face in life as attempts to stop us seeking God then we can put them in perspective. Can that be it? Really it? Can it be so straightforward?

“Seek first the Kingdom of God and other things will be added unto you”

I don’t know how to end this post. I believe I need to think about this a bit more.

Losing Battles. Winning the War

My last post ended on a bit of a pessimistic note. I think it just encapsulated my mood at the time. On sober reflection I found out that am not in battle with my human nature but at war with it. Whats the difference? A war is a sum of battles. We might lose a few battles, maybe even many, but that does not mean we have lost the war. We only lose the war when we give up. We win the war when we finally leave this earth with our relationship with God in tact.

But you cant win the war by losing every battle. But that raises questions. Is there such a thing as an optimum number of battles you can lose? I dunno. I beleive this is different for everyone. It seems everytime i get stumped on a question or an issue an answer keeps on coming up. Keep close to God. Dont mess about with your relationship with him. "The battles is mine says the Lord". I need to beleive the end already. That the result of the fight has been settled. I have already won. Just have to put the result i can see on paper into practice in real-life. Easier said than done right?

Anyhow peeps. Easy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Black Hole

"Theres a hole in my soul that wont heal"

This lyric is from a track on Kirk Franklin's Hero Album. Have you ever wondered how you feel alive and full during a church service on Sunday but the aura wears off as the week progresses and you feel empty again. Its as if the presence of God fills you up, but as the week progresses do you start running out of gas. You are bombarded with thougths, pressures, temptations that you easily lose your way.

"Theres a hole in my soul that wont heal"

Yes we all know that God has put a desire in us for him and a relationship with him is the path to fulfilling it. But that desire, that void, that hole doesnt seem to understand its role. Like the black hole in space it seems to suck in anything it interfaces. Temptations, thoughts and vices in its wake. But the more it sucks in its still not enough.

"Theres a hole in my soul that wont heal"

So how do you fill a black hole? How do you screen what tries to enter it? How do you keep your thoughts focussed on God amidst all the temptations we face in our lives? How do you win a losing battle against your human nature?

"Theres a hole in my soul that wont heal"

Where is Nigeria?

I attended a course recently which touched briefly on a concept i found fascinating. It was called the four levels to excellence or something like that:

Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence
Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence
Stage 3: Conscious Competence
Stage 4: Unconscious Competence

These stages are self explanatory but i thought this framework can apply not only to people but also countries as well. So that led me to think where is Nigeria on this grid? When i argue with people about Nigeria am always told that am unpatriotic but i believe unless you can remove patriotism and national pride from the equation, you can never really assess Nigeria issues. Identifying the issues is always a major part of solving it. There’s no need to pussyfoot about issues or engage in stroking our patriotic ego. In my opinion, Nigeria is in Stage 1. Most people will say that’s stupid. Of course we know Nigeria is incompetent. But my question is do they know why? Every Nigerian has anecdotes to tell about why Nigeria is so bad and we see evidence of this incompetence everywhere everyday. But are we prepared as a nation to ask ourselves, not the government, not our leaders but ourselves why? The only way to move from stage 1 to stage 2 is figuring out the root problem and starting to work on it. And the questions are as follows. What is behind the “Nigerian Factor”? Why does there seem to be a lack of character in this nation not only in its leaders but in its people? Why do our values seem so screwed up? What aspects of our culture are holding us back as a nation? What are we all as Nigerians (including myself) doing that continues to add to this country’s problems? Why have other countries left us behind? Are poverty and bad leadership really the source of Nigeria’s problems? Does Nigeria have a monopoly on poverty and bad leadership? Maybe the problem is deeper than that. Maybe the problem with Nigeria is that it is full of Nigerians?. For very bad leader out there, there are a tonne of equally horrible replacements barking at the gates.

This is bound to offend a lot of people. But I couldn’t care less. Unless we are ready to challenge our assumptions on this country’s problems, we aint going to move anywhere. As human beings through out life we are always eager to blame people and circumstances for our problems. But until we do some serious soul searching do we figure out what the problem is. Can this also apply to our nation. Great people detest mediocrity and overcome challenges in their path to success. Great nations are founded on excellence.

An aside. Too much emphasis is placed on voting. While it is important, there is no such thing as a quick fix. Its part of the solution but a tiny part. If the truth be told we don’t know who we are voting for. Until we are prepared as individuals to look hard at ourselves and make efforts in our own individual lives not to repeat the mistakes of those before us then we r just kidding ourselves. This can be in our places of work, homes and personal lives.

So the question is not “IF” but “Why”? Do I have all the answers to Nigeria’s problems of course not. But I have a sneaking suspicion some soul searching individually wont hurt. Just a hunch. Easy

Repentance and Root-Cause-Analysis

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently on the issue of repentance. After a while of constantly repenting about the same things over and over again you start to feel silly and start thinking of giving up. After much reflection, chatting with people and research, I think I’ve found out what the problem is. My focus has been wrong. Instead of repenting over the various things I do, what I should be repenting on is attempting to fulfil the underlying need outside my relationship with God. I stumbled on these underlying needs which we human beings crave for in yet another book I once read :)

- The need to be successful/significant
- The need to be loved
- The need to be respected and accepted

Most of our issues/faults/besetting sins can be traced to attempts to fulfil these needs outside our relationship with God. What I’ve been trying to do now is to change my focus. Repent not on the act but the need I am trying to fulfil and asking God to forgive me for not fulfilling that need in my relationship with him. But it takes a lot of reflection to identify the specific need one is attempting to satisfy and what circumstances bring about that need. Here’s where the root-cause-analysis comes in. One of my favourite sermons from House on the Rock was “Silent Killers” by Pastor Paul. He talks about the futility of chopping at the branches while leaving the root of the problem alive and well. After months of thinking and reflection, I think am getting a better understanding of my root. So whenever I fall I can now better analyse the situation around my fall and try to identify what underlying need am trying to satisfy.

But you know what, attacking the root is probably the hardest part because it forces you to confront things about yourself you might not be very happy about. But it’s a great journey. The voyage of self-discovery is an up-lifting experience. As you begin to understand yourself, you realise as Pastor Paul said that the fault ceases to have you but instead you have the fault i.e. you are in control.

Anyway that’s enough deep talk for now. Easy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

History of Garageboy

Some one asked me recently where the name "Garageboy" came from. Well it goes back to my university days which were one of the happiest times of my life. There was a genre of music called "garage" which was a mix of rap, RnB, hip-hop, dance etc.. It was a fusion of everything and i just connected with it. Whenever i went to a garage club and there was a good dj, I just felt alive. I didnt have to dance or drink or anything. Just chill in a corner and appreciate the music. It just clicked with me. It hit all the right notes. I truly was a garage-boy and looked the part with denim jackets, white trainers etc. Should i change the name now? Simple answer no.. That would not make any sense. Garageboy was my past. I come a long way since then but that phase was an important part of my makeup of who i am today.

Its funny i never intended for this blog to be religious. (You can check my 1st few posts) It just happened that way. I spose it was a gradual process as i wanted to get my act right with God that my tots started to change. Ive only begun this journey and while am not garageboy anymore at least it still gets a funny reation when people hear it.

Enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The 3 Rs: Religion, Righteousness and Relationship

I stumbled on this verse at a time when i really needed to see it.

ROMANS 3:10
"as it is written: "None is righteous, no, not one;"

One of the important lessons am being forced to learn is the difference between Religion, Righteousness and Relationship. Religion/Religious, to cut a long story short, is not it. Being religious puts emphasis on doing all the "right" external stuff with what goes on the inside relegated to the background. It is more concerned with the outward appearance of holiness. But men i need God to fix me inside and not really bothered by how people view me.So thats straightforward. I dont want to be religious.

But i desire to be righteous. Yes it is said that God is more concerned with having a relationship with me as opposed to my obedience, but both are intrinsically linked. Sin affects your relationship with God. It either burdens you will guilt that makes you feel unworthy to come to His presence. But thats where the verse above comes in.

"None is righteous, no, not one;"

Does this mean i can do whateva i want and just read my bible everyday. No!!!! Is about focus. Focusing on your relationship God allows you to draw on his power rather than relying on ur own strength which is doomed to failure. I desire to be righteous. Just need to centre my life on God and trust him. I also need to understand why i do the things i do.

Ive been reading a book recently and it talks about how the devil tricks us into meeting God-intended needs in unholy ways.
- The need to be loved he turns into lust
- The need to be respected and accepted into pride
- The need to be successful into greed

Now, this is not an all encompassing list of all sins but it helps but better understand the root causes of our actions. Since i started this blog ive been on a search to find out who i am and why i behave the way i do. I trust deepening my relationship with God will give me additional insight in the matter.

Soul searching is a very tasking journey... But you only get to the end when you figure out you dont find your soul but find God.

Have a great day everyone.

You are how u Drive.

The Japanese judge the personalities of prospective business partners by how they play a round of golf to guage their integrity and temperament. We are constantly told "we are what we eat" or is it how we eat. Its arguable that a greedy dispostion causes gluttony and a miserly one causes you to eat as little as possible. Arguable i know. But ive stumbled on a different one. You are how u drive. The manner which one drives esp in Lagos, in my humble opinion, is a reflection of ones personality. Am trying very hard not to sound moralistic. It shows:

Response to Pressure and Challenges. This shows our willingness to take shortcuts to where we want to go. Everyone has different tolerance levels to traffic. Some once they spot traffic, break the laws immediately turn into the incoming lane or take the one-way road round the corner. Others stay in traffic for a varied period of time before succumbing to the temptation and following the other guy. Some just stick it out till the end. As i said, i dont want to sound moralistic but can u say that this might be a microcosm of how we deal with problems we encounter in life? Just a tot.

Respect for Laws:
Can you claim to be an advocate of law and order if you doing 140km per hr, against traffic on 3rd Mainland Bridge at 9pm at night. Dont laugh. Ive seen this happen. This is just craziness. If u want to put your life at risk thats ur problem. But dont bring innocent people down with you. If i was LASTMA, when i catch such people, i will tell them to get out of the car. Lift their vehicle with a crane and toss it over the bridge into the Atlantic Ocean. Unfortunatley some people only respond to force.

Respect for other people
Is it possible to bash other people's car in traffic to get into their lane or to enter the queue to buy petrol during fuel scarcity. Speed up so u wont let them turn into the road or lane. Stop your car in the middle of the road to answer a phone call and still be a "Nice guy" once you get of your car. Hmmm!!!

Self Esteem
Someone once said you never really know anyone until they are in a position of power.I can safely say that apart from being on drugs, drivers of danfos,tankers, molues and staff buses have serious underlying issues. Once in a position of some sort of power against others because of the size of their vehicles, they take it upon themselves to bully everyone else off the road.
But this is not just limited to these guys. How many times have you ever had a jeep behind you trying to pratically push you off the road to show you whose boss. Or witnessed someone start chasing a car that just overtook them.


Well, as my blog states, these are just my tots. Beeng trying to write about this for a while but hey i finally did. This is 2007. The Year of "No Procrastination". :)

Easy

Come Fill my Heart

I started this habit of pasting lyrics of songs on this blog. Its part lazyiness i know. But i think it sometimes conveys best how one feels and can be very soothing reading the lyrics over as opposed to singing them. So here we go. I promise not to make this too much of a regular occurence. Maybe i should post one every month. Tag it "Song of the Month" or start a "Garageboy's top 10" chart. LOL. Anyhow am in a sort of "penance-like" mood at the mo so this is quite appropriate. Enjoy!!!!!!!!


Fill this void, and emptiness
Shine Your light, on my darkness
Satisfy, and restore my soul
I long for You, make me whole

(Chorus)
Come quench thirsting
Lord I am ready
Here I am waiting, come fill my heart
You are the only, one who can fill me
Here I am waiting, come fill my heart

Come fill my life, I am incomplete
Let Your love rain down on me
I need You more, Lord I confess
More of You, and nothing less

(Repeat Chorus)

(Bridge)
Come and fill me...I am thirsting...
For You only...God so Holy...
Come and fill me...I am thirsting...
For You only...God so Holy...

(Repeat Chorus)

Core Values

Phew!!!! So its 2007. Well to be honest i dont know whats going to be. And i have no particular milestones in mind for this year. Just to develop more professionally and personally. After all my indulgences of the xmas period, its good to chill, detox, wipe the slate clean and start all over again.

In consulting we are all preoccupied by "core values". This are the principles that should govern ones professional life to reflect the organisation's culture. My goal for this year is to be less like me and to embody more of the xtian core values i.e. the fruits of the spirit. DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its gonna be hard. Just a quick recap on the stuff i need to do:

LOVE: I need to be a more loving person and more willing to go the extra mile for people. I particularly need to express it more externally and stuff. I also need to be more open to being hurt by people and not feel taken advantage of when they hurt me.

Joy & Peace . I need to deal with my mood swings and be more cheerful all year round

Patience I dont need to explain this. If you know me am sure u will understand

Kindness Tied in with the love point earlier. There def is room for improvement

Goodness I need to cut down on my lapses and backsliding. Enough said

Faithfulness Ive been yarning about depending on God for ages. Need to work on it

gentleness I think am ok here really. :)

self-control Men this is too deep for discusion on this blog. Anger management comes to mind amongst other things. Maybe later on.


I was going to do the same analysis for the stuff not of the spirit that i should do less of but that would be too much info for public consumption. :) But hey just wanted to wish everyone a fantastic new yr.

Easy people.....

Random Musings of GarageBoy

THIS IS NOT COHERENT!!!!!! JUST GO WITH THE FLOW!!!!!!!!

Am feeling strange this morning and just want to get things off my chest. I hope you can make sense of this.....

Before i start this post let me mention a few things. I hate being in a situation where am solely dependent on anyone. I hate being a victim. It should then not come as a surprise that i also cant stand dependent people or people with a victim mind-set or mentality where nothing is their fault and cant take responsibility for their actions. This people really tick me off.

Okay. So why am i starting my post with such a diatribe. Well, thats beacuse i wanna explain why i am the way i am. Not excuse it or apologise for it, but explain it. Am one of those logic people and not really high on the emotional side. You know . More left brain than right brain. Or is it right brain than left brain. Woteva. But i hope you get the drift. I see things logically and say it how i see it. I see things in a detached manner and when they come out of my mouth, sometimes they come without any sense of emotion. This seems to rub people up the wrong way. Dunno why. Am one of those people that dont understand how people are wrapped up over how they feel about something that they lose sight of the real issue. I might need to learn to be more sensitive but hey if its a dumb idea/decision it will always be a dumb idea/decision.

Apparently, this behaviour is related with a goal-oriented mindset. I am my own harshest critic. In my quest for excellence, i have set very high standards for myself. This means that i detest failure in any aspect of my life. I just can't stand it. Thats cos meeting my goals is the most important thing to me. While i dont feel the need to brag about them and let the whole world know, it matters greatly to me. Whenever am confronted with failure even in the minutest of things i go into a tailspin for days. I wont exactly call it depression but am not in the best of moods. Pls, if am moody just leave me alone. My hatred of failure has been a motivating factor for me to always be successful in whatever i do. Whether its right or wrong is open to debate.

Thats why this xtain life is hard for me. I have to be too things that i hate with a passion. Dependent on some1 else. Have to experience failure. There is no escape. And this two things come at the same time. It is at the times i experience failure, esp in my xtain life that i should go to God, but can u see my problem. I still want to do it myself. I dont wanna let go. But i need to.. To become a successful xtain will mean a serious paridgm shift in my view to life which is not going to be easy to attain. At least i now have a greater appreciation of the problem and the underlying causes. The solution. I have to keep my ego in check. Not my public ego, but my private one.

Its gonna be hard but hey wetin i for do. :)

I prob should proof read this post but i feel its best in this manner.

Easy people.

Experience II

Following from my last post on the Experience, Kirk Franklin performed "Imagine Me" which is one of my favourite songs at the moment. It encapsulates how i feel and i assume it does for many people as well. Hear are the lyrics below. Enjoy


Imagine me, loving what I see when the
Mirror looks at me ‘cause I imagine me
In a place of no insecurities
And I’m finally happy cause
I imagine me

Letting go of all of the ones who hurt me
‘Cause they never did deserve me
Can you imagine me

Saying no to thoughts that try to control me
Remembering all you told me
Lord can You imagine me

Over what my mamma said
And healed from what my daddy did
And I wanna live and not read that page again

Chorus
Imagine me, being free
Trusting you totally
Finally I can…imagine me

I admit it was hard to see
You being in love with someone like me
But finally I can…imagine me

Being strong and not letting people break me down
You won’t get that joy this time around
Can you imagine me

In a world where nobody has to live afraid
Because of your love fears gone away
Lord, can You imagine me

Bridge
Letting go of my past
And glad I have another chance
And my heart will dance
‘Cause I don’t have to read that page again

Vamp
Gone, gone, it’s gone, all gone

The Experience

I went to "The Experience" last Friday and it was one of the best things that has ever happened to me. With all my backsliding it was the uplifting experience i craved to halt the rot. Am not very good at memorising bible verses but am better with songs. I heard this song and it touched me. Whenever u r down just replay it in your mind. Its quite relieving.

I will worship the Lord,
For He is worthy;
I will lay down my sword,
The Prince Of Peace is His name.
King of the flood,
The Lord is mighty;
The Lord can quench the evil flame.

Peace when trouble blows,
Jehovah sees, Jehovah knows;
He is my peace, when sorrow nears,
Jehovah sees, Jehovah hears.

Feel the presence of God,
Upon the water,
Hear the voice of the Lord,
Within the thunder that rolls,
King of the flood,
The Lord is mighty,
The Lord can calm the troubled soul.

Peace when trouble blows,
Jehovah sees, Jehovah knows;
He is my peace, when sorrow nears,
Jehovah sees, Jehovah hears.

Like the breath,
I need to live,
Jehovah takes, Jehovah gives;
Gives me peace,
When trouble blows,
Jehovah sees, Jehovah knows.

Judgement coming, He is my peace;
Men pursue me, He is my peace.
Judge! Judgement is coming, He is my peace;
Men pursue me, He is my peace.

Announcement

Ladies and Gentlemen. I would like to apologise for the delay in the update of my blog. This was primarily as a result of procastination and lazyness. While i cannot categorically certify that a repeat of this fiasco is unlikely, i crave your indulgence as i attempt to rectify this error and try and bring this update service back to normal.

Apologies for any incovenience caused.


Signed

Management :)

The Traffic of Life

Lagos during rush hour must be one of the last places any human being in their right mind would want to be. But as i was coming into work a few weeks ago i began to think it was the perfect microcosm of life. Chaotic. Confusion. Just a fitting description of life.

In traffic there are different lanes. Slow lane, fast lane, etc. Some people stay in their lanes peacefully, while some forcebly push themselves into other lanes thinking it will get them to their locations faster. Sometimes the slow lane becomes fast, sometimes the fast lane slow. But you know the funny thing, accident permiting, you always end up where you want to go. Might not be the time you wanted to get there. But you still get there.

Thats the story about life. People will always tell you which lane to take. When to change lanes etc. It could be based on their experience. It may be based on conventional wisdom but that doesnt mean "diddly squat". Every lane you decide to enter bears a risk and at the end of the day it is at best an educated guess.

Nobody, execpt God, knows the fastest way to get to the end in one piece. I spose thats y i need to reestablish my connection with him asap. He has the map, the traffic report. I really need to sort out my spiritual life sharpish. The TRAFFIC OF LIFE and i dont want to be stuck on Third Mainland Bridge all day.

But you know the most important thing about traffic. Its patience. Cos its out of your power and you cant fly over all the other cars.

Anyhow i hope am sort of coherent cos am not sure am making sense myself :). Easy

Moonwalking

This last few weeks have not been good. I used the word "moonwalking" but infact i really meant backsliding. I had a few bottles of wine over the last few weeks. This now seems to be the drink of choice after successfully fending off Star and JD. Apart of me is happy that this burden ive been carrying is over. The whole abstinence thing placed a lot of pressure on me. While am not going to indulge in copious amounts of alcohol anymore, I think ive resolved this issue. What is the resolution. I aint tellin. :)

But this last few weeks has been characterised by not reading my bible, i didnt even go to church on Sunday. What brought this on. I dont know. I cannot track down what led to this debacle. I suppose thats the whole idea. U skip praying for an one night before you do to bed, then reading ur bible for a day, and slowly but surely uve wandered out of your close relationship with God without even knowing it.

Ive been trying to get back over the last few days but its difficult once you lost the rhythm. I cant help feeling am using up all my mercy points with God considerng all he has done in my life. But thank God he is not a man and this is not how he operates. I need to learn how to discipline myself. Its been tough. Very tough..... I know i shouldnt give up...... Ah well. Enough talking. Just PERFORM!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

Take care peeps

Falling Up!!!

One of the things that i am constantly reminded about is the weakness of my flesh and the fragility of my will power. Carrying the burden of not wanting to dissappoint God and incur his wrath by disobeying him is a heavy burden to carry. And the guilt when we fall is immense. You are so ashamed u have fallen that like Adam you try and hide from God (even though He always knows where you are). Ive been constantly told that falling is a fact of the xtian experience and something that i would have to deal with but its hard especially if you are not used to failure in other parts of your life.

Slowly but surely i am coming to the realisation that am not falling down but falling UP.We should not view our failures as bringing us down in God's eyes, but instead increasing our standing as he sees us maturing into what he has called us to be. Its weird, but as one person once put it, we have to fail our way to success. The most important thing: HAVING YOUR HEART IN THE RIGHT PLACE AND DILLIGENTLY SEEKING HIM. Thats all he asks of us. There is no five year plan to attain spiritual maturity, there are no milestones/deadlines to meet or surpass, no heavy burden of expectations. Just to dilligently seek him.

As we navigate through this crazy life, i pray that we all FUMBLE OUR WAY TO SPIRITUAL MATURITY.

Laters Guys..

Shhhh!!!! Am a Xtain. Keep it quiet!!!!

Ive been finding myself saying this a lot ever since i began on this transformation journey. Its like a disclaimer in case i goof and look like a hypocrite. If the truth be told this is pay back for my earlier days when i used to yap "holier than thous" who will preach to you all day and make u feel condemned and the next minute doing things you wouldnt expect of a xtian. So now that ive crossed to the other side i dont want to turn into "them" especially when i know my frailties.

But is there any such thing as a holy pure xtian. Simple answer i dont know. In any case i assume it will be quite rare. This flesh we carry about is not helping matters. Now am not talking about outward holiness. That can be faked easily.. I mean what goes on in your head. How you are when the "holy police" are not around.

To be honest this might sound strange but it is not exactly cool to be a xtain. A few weeks back i went to a party and drinks were flowing. Someguy offered me a bottle of Star and i said no. Asked if i drink and i said no. I felt like such an odd ball. Like i was some sort of geek. I wont lie to you. I almost cracked there. I miss drinking i no go lie.

Anyway back to the matter at hand. I prob should not be shy to say am a xtain without a caveat. Not be ashamed to say i read my bible everyday without looking like a freak. If i do things, or say things not xtian like then hey, i aint perfect just "work-in-progress.

Thats all folks easy!!!!!!!!

Close the Door!!!!!!!

In Naija there has always been a fascination with opening doors. Doors of opportunity, doors of wealth, etc. However, i would like to focus on a different type of door. Sometimes in the name of curiosity/experimentation we open doors to things in our lives who like an unwanted guest refuse to leave when you want them to. Try out different vices either to fit in or find out what all the fuss is about. Unfortunately, we form relationships with these things and they just wont leave use.

So that got me thinking. Is it better to never have opened the door to them in the 1st place? A line of thinking disagrees. That its better to get all this stuff out of your system while you are young so when u then decide to be a goodie-too-shoes you are not tripped by it anymore. I think i belonged to this school of thought but (like my other fellow members) i drastically underestimated the effort it would take to close this door. But this view still has some merits. The temptation will always be around. Would you rather gain victory over it while you are young and single? Or be severely tempted when other people are affected eg. wife and kids..........

The option of never opening the door in the first place only works if you dont always run away from temptation all the time. Especially if its always on your mind. To be truly in control, one must be able to stand firm amidst temptation. Running away will only postpone the day when you eventually have to choose between opening and closing the door to certain vices. Obviously, surrounding yourself with temptation everytime is barmy, but employing a strategy of always running away is also equally nutty.

What do i think is the best option? Well to be able to never have opened the door, live amidst temptation and still not fall... Unrealistic. Probably. but if i could roll back the hands of time, that is what i would do.

Phew!!!!!!!!! Now that ive got that off my chest. Gosta go.........

Say No to Drugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now before anyone starts getting worried am not on any drugs. But thats the problem. Confused. Calm down. I dont mean illicit drugs like coke, heroin etc. By the way if you are reading this blog and you do use illicit drugs, please let me know who you are so i can update my block list on my messenger. :) . Am talking about prescribed drugs apparently meant to make you feel better.

Now am no pharmacist but i dont believe in taking drugs. A part of me honestly believes they dont work. Am one of those people who only use medicine or see the doctor as a last resort. I dont know why. Maybe its a macho thing and i dont want to accept that i might be weak/infallible and need help. That might be part of it but thats not the whole issue. I think drugs are abused in Naija. Every Nigerian is a pharmacist and know of all least 10 different types of Mydryclinin or mtrcyklin to fix any headache. But you know what the pain always goes away eventually without having to pump your body with funky chemicals.

I believe in the development of a body's natural defences. If you always give it a hand at every chance it gets to stregthen how is it supposed to develop. You just have to chest it.

Well but i do suffer for this belief. Had a bad cold yesterday. Ive always get bad colds from time to time. Everyone tells me its allegeries and recommended some funky medicines called antihistimies or amphetamines or whatever. Now i should just go to a doctor get it checked out and sorted right. But i cant bring myself to do it. Thankfully this attacks only last a day. So i sneeeze like hell for one day and am fine. I suppose thats why i decide to chest it. If it was longer than one day i think my resistance will definitely weaken.


However before i end this post; a quick disclaimer. ABEG!!! IF YOU ARE FEELING ILL NO FOLLOW ME O!!!!!!!! GO TO A DOCTOR!!!!!!!!! I AM OF LIMITED MEANS AND WILL BE A MAJOR DISSAPPOINTMENT TO YOU IN THE EVENT OF SUCCESSFUL LITIGATION.

Easy

O Blogger, Where art Thou?

Well well well. What can i say. Ive missed my blog. Two months. Thats quite shocking really. But am back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

So much has happened over the last few months. Ive had a brush (literally ask my car) with armed robbers. I suppose that completes it. Am a Lagosian now. Once youve had your car bashed, issues with corrupt police men, had to push your car with a stranger to get it to restart on your way to work, then a chanced meeting with armed robbers that really completes the Lagos experience. Well not really. To make it really complete you have to include LASTMA and area boys. Thankfully that hasnt happened. And never will ;)

So what about my xtian life. Have i made any progress since my last deep post? Well, simple answer, no. I believe theres a link between my slacking in my spiritual life to all the crap thats been happening. Thank God for grace that all potentially disastrous events all had the best possible outcome.

I used to think maybe i was being punished for my slacking and i should just live up to the consequences of my in/actions . Maybe this is true. But am grateful to have a God who does not punish me as i deserve. Ive taken it on the chin and am getting my focus back to stop playing with my covering.

But it is really hard finding quality time to spend with God when you are always working and always tired. Its weird that i can watch tv when i am knackered, but whenever i try picking up my bible, i start snoring. Some days, when i have spare time, i find it easy reading everything else but just not my bible. I just cant explain it. But am trying really hard to focus on the most important thing in my life. My relationship with the Most High!!!!! Its still as hard as it has ever been. Like the Israelites i keep on longing for Egypt even though i sense am near the promised land. I need God's grace more than anything now.

Considering the alcohol thing, some progress. Ive stopped drinking beer for a few months and now i have to tighten my belt to stop my trousers falling off :). But there is still a sticky point. Is it wrong to have a glass of wine? Well this is quite tricky. If i just substitute drinking beer for wine, then who am i kidding. I might as well shack the Star as well. It really feels weird not having a drink. Its actually quite tough and i have still do deal with serious cravings. Especially after a bad day. But there is something liberating from not drinking. I still hang out with friends at bars but they dont force me to have a drink which is very helpful. So am not totally square.

Anyway back to the real issue. The Moral of the story simply is Stay close to God!!!!! Especially when it is difficult . No matter how far you stray he is always ready to guide you back home.

Anyhow folks. Nice to be liberated again. Hope it wont be 2 months till my next post.

Easy

When Things Fall Apart

A few weeks ago i had a car accident on the Island, or rather some lady reversed into me without looking back. Women Drivers!!!!!!! :). After going mad, swearing at her and taking her cheque (yes i took a cheque in Lagos), i found out a lot about myself.

1st i still have to work on my temper which i kinda knew already. If any1 had said half the things i said to that lady i would prob have smacked them. Well at least tried to :)

2ndly, after the whole affair, I needed to go somewhere i could clear my head and gather my thoughts and get my act together. Did i go to a friend's house? No. A church? No. I went to my office and to be honest thinking about it now, that is very scary.......... I found solace in my place of work. Talk about a work life balance. Ive now made a conscious decision only to go to work after hours when it is absolutely necessary....

I also learnt some other things about myself which am not going to get into on this blog maybe some other time. But i spose u get to know your real self when "Things fall apart" as opposed to when its all honkey dory........

Anyway thats enough for 2day....

Ps: The cheque cleared by the way. Maybe she wasnt so bad after all and there are still decent people left in Lagos

Lead me not into Temptation. I can find it myself

I got this line from a great book i just finished reading "Winning the Battle Within". It talks about winning the battle over temptation and to be honest i found it to be very insightful. There are few things that i took home from the book and i thought it would be a good idea to share with everyone else:

1. You will be tempted for the rest of our lives: We will never reach a level where we will be such great Xtians that we will be above temptation, We are going to deal with it for the rest of our lives. Doesnt sound like a great thought but thats the way it is
2. Everybody is tempted: Everybody is tempted no matter how great spiritually we might think they are. I mean Jesus was tempted. It doesnt get higher than that.
3. The devil does not make us sin, we choose to sin: We should take responsibility for our actions. No matter how great the temptation we choose to sin ourselves. No body pushes us over the cliff. We jump!!!!!!!!!!
   
4. We need daily deliverance: We live in a world full of temptations and in a carnal body that loves doing wrong. We need to ask God for deliverance from it and our surroundings everyday!!!!!
5. Repent immediately and get back up again: There's no need crying about it when we fall. Repent, move on and get on track with your relationship with God. Period. Lets face it. He knew you were going to fall before you did. Guilt does not serve any purpose apart from making us feel bad
   
6. We can overcome temptation: God will never give us more than we can handle. He knows our weaknesses but he also sees our hearts.
   

Well i just did a bad job paraphrasing a 200 page book but if anything it gave me confidence and spoke to me when i needed to hear it the most.....................

Easy!!!!!!!!!

Love and Money

For a long time, people have used the phrase "Its the thought that counts". Lets face it ive used it a few times to get myself out of tricky situations. The use of money to show love has been branded as shallow, materialistic etc.. But am not so sure anymore.

I suppose this depends on your attitude towards money. If you are a spendthrift then you wont need that much encouragement to buy expensive gifts and stuff. But if you are a tight git, like yours truly, then u find out you will hold back and this is not limited to gifts. It could be beggars in traffic, cousin who needs credit etc..... Is it possible to show love and still be tight.......

I dont know but there is something liberating about doing a good deed. Being prudent is good. But can you be too prudent that it becomes overbearing... I think so. It shouldnt control you. As we say in Naija. Spend this money!!! Live life!!!!! Let it go!!!!!!!

So hey the thought counts but money counts a lot as welll.........

I think?

Anyhows peace out

Searching for oneself

Every once in a while, its always good to find out who exactly we are and why we do the things we do. In searching for that understanding i stumbled on this website http://www.9types.com/homepage.actual.html. It lists the various personalities and traits etc. Now i know that this is not exactly everyones cup of tea, but for a laugh its a good idea to have a look and see where u fit.

Most people will likely fit into many categories but there will be one dominant personality. Its strange but some of the stuff is actually true. (let me talk about myself :) ) So the major question..... So you find out who you are, then what........

Hmmm..... Thats a good question. It depends how much you believe this stuff. Some people might link new reasons why they behave the way they behave. Others dont.....

I feel it is a good thing to come back at intervals to see if your are changing or not.....

So have a look and see if its worth it.


Laters.....

Thou Shalt Not Drink Part II

Now i know sequels are in fashion and i dont mean those crappy Nollywood sequels which have been in season before the beginning of time. I mean the other equally crappy sequels that come out of Hollywood i.e. Mission Impossible 3, Scary Movie 100 etc. Lets face it. Sequels are never as good as the originals and most of the time they get worse and worse e.g. the Matrix. But thats not the reason for this post. I would actually want to revisit an issue i dicussed earlier on in my blog.

Is it wrong to drink?

I actually tried a period of abstinence which was quite interesting. I discovered that i didnt die which shows am not as much as an alcoholic as i feared but it also shows me that that in itself doesnt make for a better relationship with God. It was good for the outward saintly appearance but not much for inside. In my opinion it was largely symbolical and to be honest i dont think its that mission critical.

Its about moderation and self control just like any part of life. Its very difficult to be holy. To be honest sometimes its feels like its just not in my nature and i shouldnt bother, But a little voice keeps on telling me to keep going.

I never thought that being a xtian was such an excruciating experience. Sometimes i feel like giving up. Its hard and it can get you down when you know you are weak. and pathetic......

Anyway, i think i need to take stock and take things easy for a while. I hate to say this but it looks like there is going to be a part 3. (Hate sounding like a hypocryte). What can I say the story continues.....

Laters

Home is Where the Heart Is

Well it was in the "Wizard of Oz" where Dorothy goes there is no place like home. And you know what she was absolutely right. There really is no place like home. Its very strange that despite all Nigeria's problems whenever u leave for a period of time you start longing to come back even with NEPA, traffic etc. It got me thinking so what makes home, well, home.

Home changes for us all as we go through life. Could be the town you were born, work or went to university. Its that place where you feel or felt at peace, at ease, at home. I know am no masochist but Lagos is home for me. I dont know why? To the rational mind it shouldnt be. But this is where i grew up. Ive had memories here that i would never want to erase or forget. Amidst all the chaos it seems Lagos will always have somewhere special in my heart. Well what can i say. Home is where the Heart is. How true!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Say Something Positive

Now if you have been a frequent reader of my blog you will notice i bash Naija a lot. Lets face it, its very easy to do. But i always critise foreign correspondents who only write negative stories about Nigeria. So a few weeks back i decided to put my money where my mouth was and write something positive. After thinking for about 20 mins, i noticed the ideas were not flowing as they normally do. Is it that there is nothing good to write about Nigeria or its always easier to write negative stories?

The fact is, in my opinion, it is more of the latter than the former. It seems easier for humans to be negative, pessimistic and to see the wrong in everything than the noble and good. This is moreso when weve been through what weve been thru in Naija. Its like "Ive heard this all before", " This country is $%^^£$" etc. But does this pessimistic atmosphere enable objective thinking about Nigeria's situation? Besides decay and corruption, is it that nothing of any repute occurs in this nation?

So here i go. I will give it a try. Say something positive. This might sound lame and basic but i honestly belive it is a testament to Nigerians that despite our differences and all we have been though, we still stay together as one nation. I dont think that there is any other group of people in the world as long suffering as your average Nigeria who despite all the desperation around him keeps on striving and hoping that tomorrow "go beta". Who lives in horrendous conditions without the basic necesities of life. Who can barely afford to provide for his families needs, but still somehow wakes up the next day prepared for whatever challenges the day might throw at him. Despite all his faults, that kind of persistence and strenght takes guts and not only do Nigerians do this, they do it with a smile on their faces. This i say is admirable.

So for one post at least let me say this. I look forward to a Nigeria where its citizens long-suffering will be rewarded. And I hope, pray and believe that i will see it in my life-time .

God Bless Nigeria!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dependency on God

The one thing i have noticed for a while now is that it is both easy and difficult to depend on God. What does that mean? Exactly what i said. Theres a tendency, i suppose human tendnecy, that we seperate our challenges into two. Those that we can handle overselves e.g. routine work, daily challenges etc. Then we also have things that we beleive are out of hands that we need God for e.g. life partner, career aspirations etc..... For the latter it seems easy to depend on God for them because they are huge... But for the former its much harder..

I dont know about you, but i struggle with this. I suppose its ego related. To depend totally on God requires a lot of humility. You just need to cut yourself down and acknowledge that without God you are nothing and you need him for everything you do in life. Now thats tough. To beleive that every success you ever achieve is not solely because of your actions or intelligence and you might not be as great as you think you are can be difficult. But that daily dependence on God puts that ego in check. It stops you thinking more highly of yourself than u ought and helps you relate better with others.

This is an area that will need to be reflected on deeply and "requires improvement".

Anyway, enough about that.. See yall around..

The Customer is always WRONG

Now in Nigeria am sure we are used to the way things are always the reverse of how they are in more developed well run countries. The title of this post seems silly, but am starting to believe thats exactly what many Nigerians in the service industry think.

In the space a few hours, a few weekends ago, i was subjected to the "Lets frustrate the customer" attitude of my fellow Nigerians. A lady in a shop said a friend and i were not "bouyant" enough to shop at her store, which i thought was a very nice way to get customers. I suppose the whole idea was to get us to prove her wrong and buy something. Youve got no chance there love.

Another lady at a restaurant was not that bad but was "robotic" in her attitude. There was a deal for a meal and a drink for N800. I said i wanted a bottle of water and she told me i could only have either coke, fanta and sprite. And i was like, water is cheaper than coke so it benefits you and benefits my health as well. But i think she had issues which logic so she wouldnt come round. After arguing with her for about 5 minutes, i asked to talk to her manager. But alas, they attended the same customer service school and he didnt see anything wrong in her flawed arguement. As i was very hungry i decided to have the coke and behave myself. A while back i would have argued with the manager for another 10 mins but i couldnt be arsed. The chicken was nice so hey all is forgiven. I must just make sure i sneak in my bottle of water next time. :)

And talking about sneaking drinks in, a bottle of Coke in Silverbird is now N300. Thats about $2 for a 50cl bottle of Coca-cola. Now there a lot things i would rather do than succumb to the love of margins by certain organisations. But guess what people still pay for it. AAAAAAAArrrrrrrrrggggggggHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! . Thats why they keep on ripping us off. We willingly let them. As for me, unless that bottle of coke is made of gold, i aint interested.

Anyway, back to customer service. Why do Nigerians find it difficult to serve people. This goes all the way to the higest echelons of power in this nation. Everyone wants to be the Oga and feels serving people is beneaath them. We are we so full of ourselves, what do we have to be proud out?

Its all about humility... It never goes amiss. Anyhow, till it changes, i will continue to be confront rudeness and foolishness wherever i encounter it.

Cheers..........

Clay in the Potter's Hands

Today's sermon focused on us being clay in God's hands as he moulds us and shapes us into the person he called us to be. The one thing that struck me about the sermon was that it is a continuous process. Its not like after a few weeks, months or years we become the finished article, all perfect, holy and pure. Its a process that occurs daily in our lives and involves refining our rough edges or starting all over again for the 100th time.

This is one of the most important things to grasp. The magnitude of God's grace is so huge that its impossible to quantify especially as a human being. If someone messes you up a few times you cut them off. Period. No questions asked. So it's hard to understand why someone else can tolerate the multitude of times we screw up (even in a week) and not immediately punish us. To be honest, i cannot fathom the depth and breadth of that kind of love and can only be grateful its there.

I always feel weird when i post a spiritual topic. I dunno why. I suppose it kinds of puts pressure on me to act and behave in a certain way so as not to look like a hypocrite. But hey i aint gonna lie. I aint righteous, i aint holy and i aint perfect. But i would like to be all these things and i intend to strive towards this. Its a very long journey full up high mountains and deep valleys. I might stray from the path once in a while but guess what, He is nearby to put me back on track.

Anyhow, enough deep talk for now.

Later

Its been a long time, long time .....

Well its been about 2-3 weeks since my last post which is quite scandalous but hey am back. I spose i just got sucked into Lagos life and kept on procastinating...

Anyhow am back. I hope i still remember how to do this thing :)

Later

Okada!!! Okada!!!!

Being back in Lagos now for the last week or so i have been re-acquainted with that stalwart of Lagos life. The Okada driver. That unique seemingly possessed rider of nosiy Chinese manufactured two-wheeled death traps leaving confusion, death and destruction in their wake. Sometimes you see them weave in and out of traffic, sometimes weaving in between cars on the 3rd Mainland Bridge. Yes you heard me on Third Main Land bridge. Those guys are nutters.

Hardly a day passes without some Okada testing your reflex actions to see how quickly you can step on your brakes. And that got me thinking. What could be the average lifespan of an okada driver? Is it possible to be an Okada driver for, i dunno, 10 years. To be honest i dont think its possible. If there are such people who have lived for 10 yrs driving an Okada daily, then that should prove to any doubting Thomas that there is a God.

I think the fumes from the okada engine must intoxicate the drivers because i dont think they know how small those things are. As far as your guy is concerned, he is driving a bad ass Hummer and if that stupid driver in the Honda horning at him to get out of the way doesn't stop he will bash his bumper to teach him a lesson. During Sallah i saw an okada whose passenger was carrying two rams on the either side turboing down Eko bridge. Now what do you do when confronted with such foolhardiness.

When i went to Cotonou ages ago. The Okada drivers were organised and orderly and didnt try and challenge cars for the rights to the road. Which then shows that there is no problem with motorcycles as a mode of transport. The problem is the psychotic Nigerian on it. In Nigeria, we have a lot of mentally ill people who should probably be tied up in a psychatric hospital left to drive danfos and okadas. Now i know this is a way of life and provides people with that daily income that keeps them from dying of hunger. I appreciate that. But does that give them the right to put the lives of their passengers, innocent bystanders and other motorists at risk.

Any tips to handle these menace apart from banning them would be welcomed. In the mean time, drive with not just your eyes, but with you ears, nose and mouth wide open. :)

Enjoy.....

The Need for a Routine

Right. Now this might seem obvious. Of course one needs to have a routine to better effectively manage and get the most out of each day. But where does ones life stop being well planned and start getting monotonous? Where does being well organised and efficient start turning into being a boring, inflexible git, stuck in your ways and not willing to change? Is it such a distinct trade-off? Are the gains of this supposed trade-off worth it?

I suppose structure is the foundation to everything in life. Unless you are in the creative industry where structure runs against everything you stand for and impairs your innovative ability. We all need some semblance of structure in our lives. But in order to develop personally.. does that necessarily mean more structure in our lives.. More discipline..... Is there other way to strive for perfection in ones life without that necessarily mean being more "uptight". Variety is supposedly the spice of life. Can there being a structured way to achieve this variety? Isnt that a contradiction in itself?

I touched on how structure impairs ones innovativeness..... If striclty adhered to, a routine can confine your thoughts, options and experiences. It can limit what we get out of life. So i propose a solution. Yes i know little me. But i think it will work. Its a twin approach. Review your high-level plans at regular intervals to see if they are still relevant to whats important to you. Make the necessary adjustments (if any) and proceed ruthlessly to ensure once selected they are implemented. Define a routine to help you achieve this goal and pursue it rigourously.

Well what do i know. I just think this is a good idea. Anyhow gotta go. Laters people.

Slave to Brands

Now i used to love Virgin Nigeria. Roomy aircraft. Well organised and stuff. I staunchly defended them against anyone who had a bad word to say about them. In some way i identified with the goals to be Nigerian and world class and i really wanted them to suceed. However, my experience last week Friday on the Abuja-Lagos scared the crap out of me. Talk about rollercoasters. Its was surreal. I dont know if the Russian pilots had over indulged in their customary Smirnoff (am assuming this is what russians do that is if these guys are even russian ) before the flight, but it seemed your guy was looking for the baddest clouds in the sky and intentionally flying into them. But after we landed and i got over the shock of it all. I started questioning my loyalty to the Virgin Nigeria brand and why i was so loyal in the 1st place.

Its not only true that "You are what you eat", its also true that you are what you wear, where you shop, what you buy there, where you eat, what you eat there. The brands we long to be associated with shows the kind of person we are. Or does it? Quick exercise. Go home and have a look at your shopping bags. I bet you will fall in one of the 3 categories below:

Type 1 (Fashionista):

• Designer bags galore esp Selfridges and Harrods. Brings every single shopping bag gotten when they travelled out of the country back.
  
• Carry their TM Lewin shopping bags everywhere. Serve as bible holders, file jacket for the office. Just need everyone to know i can buy a shirt for 7.5k
  
• Use Nike, Adidas or Puma bags when carrying sport related items.
  
• Use Duty Free Shopping Bags to masks the items contained in local bags inside. Cant have people think we shop in the country
  

Type 2 (Easy Shopper)

• Has a wide variety of bags. Doesnt send which ones. More concerned about value for money for the items inside and couldnt care less what image it projects. This is me by the way. :)
  

Type 3 ( Wanna Be)

• Accumulates rumpled/ used bags utilised by Type 1

Now not to sound hypocrytical, we all probably have a bit of the 3 types in us in different shades. Our level of dependency on these status items for a sense of self-worth varies per person. But we all derive some sense of comfort from the safety provided by brands. Why go to Silverbird instead of City Mall? Suppose the whole idea is not to get hung up on it and know you are who you are. At the end of the day, brand loyalty is just making someone else wads of cash in guaranteed sales.

Anyhow. Have to go. Enjoy

A Tale of Two Cities

With the recent arrival of the Palms Mall in Lekki, which is fantastic by the way, am getting the feeling that Lagos is gradually being split into two very different cities. Yes, that gap already exists. I mean imagine comparing Ikoyi and Agege. But my fear is that this gap is going to be further entrenched and relatively nice places like Surulere, and if care is not taken Ikeja, will be pushed lower down the pecking order. In 5 years time, we could have a wonderful modern centre encircled by crappy, decaying suburbs.

And i believe there is an instutionalised decision to make this so. The majority of the suggested improvements to the infrastructure of Lagos State is centered on Lekki-Ikoyi-VI-Lagos Island axis. When its all done or sorry if it is done at all (weve been here before), we could have a psuedo-developed world where its inhabitants shop at Shoprite and Game, sip cappacinos and lattes at trendy cafes, down shots of tequila in classy bars, struggle to choose which cinema to watch "King Kong II", while cruising on well illuminated and pot hole free roads. And the rest of us. Well thank God for our local Mr Biggs and Tantalizers.

Now dont get me wrong. Am not a communist or even socialist for that matter. I love to enjoy the life and will happily jump at the 1st opportunity to live on the island. But youve got to spread the love round. One should not have to drive all the way to the island just to enjoy the "flenjo life". This narrow minded view of development needs to change. It will only increase the already manic rush to live on the island which will wreack havoc on the "to-be" developed infrastructure. And we will back at square one again wondering how we got there.

Anyhow, i would like to think this is being done in phases and this is just phase one (dont hold your breath). In the mean time. Have to keep hunting for a bargain. This island life sounds appealing..........

Later

Thug Life Naija Style

Now in most countries a thug is what you call rif raff who indulge in illegal activity and go about beating people up. Hold on that's a Nigerian Politician. To be honest comparing Tupac Shakur to a Nigerian politician is probably an insult to the man's memory but in the league of thugs he has to be the benchmark.

But just for a laugh, lets play "Spot the Difference". Tupac was intelligent, forward thinking, cared about his fellow black brothers. And our politicians, well, they are not completely heartless. They care very much for themselves and if they are above average maybe their nuclear family as well. Please dont call them servants of the people, thats insulting and as Africans we should respect our elders.

So there you have it. The result of our rather brief analysis shows the people who make daily decisions about our lives aint any better than an American area boy. But are we surprised? Of course not. Long before the butchers of Ibadan and Anambra came on the scene, we always had an inclination that the level of intellectual sophistication of our leaders was at best suspect. Maybe it was their inability to pronounce words like "integrity", "justice", "infrastructure", or phrases like "fair elections". I dont know. I can't seem to put my finger on it exactly. But what i do know is it wasn't as a result of their charitable well-meaning nature.

But as the phrase goes "If you can't beat them (no pun intended) join them". I know the pen is mightier than the sword but please, waving articles at a bunch of miscreants armed to the teeth with guns and knives is laugable. So if thats the case, How do we reclaim our country back? Well i wont lie to you. I dont know. I have to put that one in the to do file. But in the mean time ive got one very good idea. Pray......

Happy Wednesday

Fergie, Thank U and Goodbye

Ok. Ive have had it. As a Man U fan i feel weve hit a brick wall. Alex Fergusson you have been great. Won us the Champions League. Wonderful (One of the best days of my life even). Celebrated numerous premiership titles and FA Cups. Fantastic. But every dog has its day and times up Fergie. You just aint the ferocious rottweiler you used to be. Even Darren Fletcher aint scared of you anymore.

I just hope Fergie goes out in a dignified manner. Jump before he is pushed. Resign before he is fired. Takes a hint before they take it out on him. Cos the Glazers aint sentimental folk. They will chuck you out like last week's moulding pizza guaranteed to leave a bad taste in the mouth.

Come on Fergie. Leave me with my happy memories. Dont cloud them with nightmares of Man City and Burton Albion with Jose Mourinho dancing in the background. Admit it you just aint the manager you used be.

Am sure deep down Fergie knows but keeps thinking he can turn it around. Dont think you can mate. Just do us a favour: Stop buying anymore players, Save the extra cash for the next manager (hopefully Gus Hiddink), buy yourself a nice house in the Bahamas, even Abuja is quite nice, put your feet up and chill. Cos mate this management thing aint really going anywhere anymore.

Sir Alex. Thanks for everything over the years. Youve been great and i wish you the best in all you do but pls be a nice old man and go gracefully. Thank you Sir

Draw me close to You...

Continuing on the religious tone of my last few posts. One of my main goals this year is to have a closer relationship with God. Over the last few years, this has been an on and off relationship and is definitely something i wish to rectify this year. A good start is to try and spend more time with God everyday. This calls for discipline and effective time management. There can be no excuses. Have to "Nike" it (Just Do It).

The common phrase the "Spirit is willing, but the Flesh is weak" is especially apt in this case. I suppose everyone faces this daily inner battle, knowingly doing things that are wrong and feeling guilty afterwards. Why do we to this? Why does sin seem to have such control over us? How does one stay in the power of the Holy Spirit 24-7? How does one live in this world with temptation all around us and not fall?

I think its possible tho. I strongly believe that if i discipline myself and keep to the straight and narrow, i can get this relationship with God that i eagerly desire. But i have failed enough times to know it aint gonna be easy. Infact controlling your human nature is prob one of the hardest things there is. At times the battle looks unwinnable, the task unsurmountable but its definitely achievable. I just have to realise that i cant do that myself but with the help of the Almighty.

Herein lies the paradox. To get closer to God you have to spend more time with him. The flesh prevents you from getting closer to him. To defeat the flesh you need God's help which you get from spending more time with him. Argggggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!. Okay this might a bit of an exageration but its clear to everyone the challenges which we face.

But i strongly believe it is a winnable battle and one i intend to win this year.

Thanks people and talk to you soon.....

Thou Shalt Not Drink?

Now this is prob a controversial topic but i think its a fair one. Can you become closer to God and still consume copious of alcohol on a weekly basis? Simple answer NO!!!. It ain't gonna happen. Okay fair enough.

What about if you drank a moderate amount of alcohol a week. Lets say 7 bottles of Star a week. But this brings up a dilemnna. What constitutes a moderate amount of alcohol? If i drank a bottle a day. Suppose that wont be a problem. But what if i drank the whole 7 on a Friday night. Now that definitely is not moderate.

So we have a bigger problem than i initially thought. Obviously, everyone has their own alcohol tolerance limit, so a one-fits-all approach doesnt work. Also there are different types of alcohol that you can consume e.g. beer, wine, spirits etc. So how do you come up with a benchmark as to what is a moderate amount. Hmmm interesting.

I can already hear what many people will be thinking. Well just stop drinking alcohol. Easy as ABC. But i will tell them one thing. If you tried to stop drinking all types of soft drinks and juices and confined yourself to drinking water only, you wouldn't even last a week. Yes they are different but the principles are the same. OLD HABITS DIE HARD.

But back to the original question. Do you have to give up alcohol before you can get closer to God. To be honest i dont know. I do know that rolling around in a druken stupour is definitely not going to help your relationship with the Most High ( i dont do that by the way). But is it that black and white? No Drink or No God?

I dont think so. I am being careful not to blaspheme but i dont think its that clear cut. Yes abstinence is the best answer and it would be wonderful to have such will power but i dont believe that the occasional moderate drink is entirely evil. Its about keeping the drink moderate and occasional.

This is a topic i still need to think about a lot more. As the halo effect of the New Year still surrounds me, it will be nice to get closure on some issues such as this.

Definitely to be continued at a later date..........

Bring on 2006

As 2005 nears its end. Ive started to think back over the year and see what i accomplished. Did i keep any new year resolutions. (Ehm no). Did i grow more as a person. Definitely.... Could i have accomplished a lot more this year. Hell Yeah!!!!!!!

I know this sounds like consultant speak but i think i need to develop a plan for next year. A workplan to be precise. Need to put pen to paper and define clearly what my goals for 2006 are. Thats gonna require some serious soul searching but i think its important. I would love to be here this time next year ticking all the tasks i have completed and seeing that ive made progress.

But what if i failed to complete most of the goals i set for myself. Now that would be sad. Depressing even. But hey, at least i get to find out all the things about myself that i have to work harder on.

So as 2005 draws to a close. Just would like to wish everyone a fantastic year ahead. I should be great year both in our own respective lives and collectively as a nation. Bring on 2006.

Regards,

Want I want for XMAS

Now, unfortunately i will not be getting any serious presents this year. As in proper presents. So i have come up with an ingenious idea. I will make a list of all i want for xmas and hopefully some1 will be in a generous mood and get me one of them. So here we go.......

1) A pair of Converse Chuck Taylors
2) Nice pair of black shoes. Not suede pls
3) A bluetooth USB connector
4) A bottle of JD
5) A bottle of Johnny Walker
6) A crate of Guiness Extra Smooth (am not an alcoholic)
7) A nice new mafia-like suit. Preferably pink stripes
8) A DVD player
9) A new hand luggage
10) A nice flat in Ikoyi...... :)

Anyone who can get any of this stuff for me, gets a friend for life!!!!

Later

The Fear of Flying

The events of the last 2 months in the aviation industry has brought the fragility of life to the fore. Having flown Bellview and Sosoliso, it just shows how one narrowly flirts with danger in everyday life. Am not the most spriritual of people but you just have to thank God for everyday we live on this earth.

To believe that some businessmen put money before people's lives is sickening to say the least.... I recently read an article by a Capt Tito on the aviation industry and to be honest i wish i didnt read it. It is a simple case of "The Truth. You cant handle the Truth". We have all been flying on a prayer. On the grace of God.... Its a miracle we havent had more crashes. So many innocent lives. So much anger. So much pain. So much sadness.

All we can do is continually live in God's grace or is it fly by God's grace. We should have scrapped the bottom of the barrel by now. Is it really possible how things to get worse? How?

Well its strictly Virgin Nigeria and Aero Contractors from now on. Or else I WILL WALK. I no it does not mean anything and crashes cant be predicted but hey. God helps those who help themselves..........(Thats not in the Bible by the way).

Anyway, my next encounter on a plane is this weekend. It should go ok. I will be lying if i said i am not scared but something at the back of my mind says i will be fine. It will be fine!!!!!

Patience is a Virtue

Patience seems like such a simple thing. Just be calm. Dont let things get to you. Just take it easy. But damnnnnn its difficult being patient. Patient with people, patient with life, progress etc. But it is something we all need. Well i need. Need to learn how to take a chill pill and just chill. Dont let things get to you. But damn its hard. Its not like i need an anger management course, but does anyone have ideas? How does one become patient? Is it something you learn? Or are you just born with it? Anyway i suppose i need to be patient for a response. This will prob be a good start....


Later

Ijebu!!!! Me???

Hmm. Moment of reflection. Ive always tot i was prudent with money but Ijebu. Neva. But since ive been accused of that recently, i have had to pause for thought and analyse my spending patterns. Today at lunch, the canteen sold a bottle of freshly squeezed orange juice for N300. Now i dont know about you, but for some cheap ass oranges squeezed into a used bottle of water (i hope they washed it beforehand otherwise you will be buying a lot more than orange juice) i was like get real.

But if the truth be told. I reckon i am a bit of an Ijebu. If the thing is 5 bucks and is not worth 5 buckds then 4 get it. Am not touching it at all. But why do people yap Ijebu people anyway. I know a lot of them that are not tight.

But theres nutn wrong with being prudent. I mean i cant be a spend thrift. As long as i dont hoard money i believe am ok. Anyway my conscience is clear......

To Buy or Not to Buy!!!!

Been thinking of what to get my parents for XMAS and that is no easy fit. Wanted to get them an Astra Water Dispenser but that is supposed to cost 60K. What a joke!! I might as well buy them a small fridge. And use the rest of the money to stock up on eva water to last for a year. We readily get ripped off in this country.

But i seriously need ideas as to what to get them. Some bout of inspiration. Mayb a TV but that is hardly original. Need to investigate this further. Ideas will be welcomed..........

In most other countries in the world they have sales during xmas. Not here tho. In XMAS we jack up prices... Its almost perverse but then again its Nigeria....

As for the rest of my friends will a text message suffice. Hmmm..... It would be nice to send cards and little presents to friends mayb nice sweets or soemthing. But i have to admit the 10 bucks text message is looking appealing. Can contact everyone from the luxury of your sofa at home while still watching tv......

But its sad tho. The Xmas spirit aint alive anymore. Or mayb its cos we have all grown up. Anyhow have to go later.

Mondays!!!!

Lord knows i hate Monday mornings. Well at least 4 more hours and then done for the day. Almost there. This week has potential to go both ways. Lets hope it will be great.

Up MAN U

We are back. Arsenal lost again(Its becoming a habit). The premeirship race is back on. We can still win. Chelsea fans beware. We need to conduct January sales at United. Get rid of O'Shea, Fletcher, & Co. Am sure Fergie gets the picture now.

But seriously, I honestly believe we can win the premiership this season. If Mikel Obi joins in January. Men that guys agent must be the biggest bstard in history. But i will save that rant for another day.

Peace out people

Abuja Life

I hate to sound like a Lagosian but Abuja must be the most boring place on earth. I mean after Dome, Nicon and the Point. What else can you do. I tell you what? Nothing... At least i get to go to Lagos tomorrow. Thank God

Welcome!!!

Hello.

This is my first post on my first blog. Just going to use this blog to discuss the things that mean a lot to me and unburden myself online. Laters